10/20/12

Happy Ever After Contract

Say what you want about 50 Shades of Grey, the reason the male partner had the upper hand, is because he had a multi-page agreement with explicit details that was signed by both parties. Some women found the sex hot, not me.  I put the book down when the spanking and shackles got the forefront, but I do remember the 'hard & soft limits' described in his agreement.  The woman knew exactly what to expect in great details in the relationship and so did he.  Every couple has their particular deal and the strongest unions brag about some type of agreement written or not.  "Discussing your expectations explicitly helps keep you from becoming frustrated & disappointed in your relationship", says Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum.  If you and your partner decide honestly before your cohabitation, you will avoid one of you eventually saying, "I would never have married or moved in with you if I had known "X" or would'nt agree to "Y".  This may sound like a pre-nuptial agreement and many women are not comfortable with this type of a contract.  It breathes some kind of mis-trust, but some of us have short memory and although the Love is there, accusations fly during ridiculous fights.  Knowing your relationship boundaries and writing them down for each other to see is not a bad idea.  So, if a Happy Ever After Contract will make your relationship stronger, go for it.  If you think not, you should at least have the conversation. You will never know your "hard & soft limits" until the discussion begins!

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